Lately I've been thinking a bit about rewards and punishment, and especially about smacking. We don't smack our kids. We gave Rose the occassional hit on the hand up until about 18 months, and now deeply regret it. I don't agree with smacking any more. I grew up thinking it was ok, partly because of the oft-quoted "spare the rod, spoil the child", and vague notions of the goodness and severity of God, the discipline of God, the wrath of God, the fear of God, etc.
For the record I am terrified of God. I need to think and pray about my theology of the fear of God as I read this book, together with my ideas about how much we should try to emulate God's fatherhood through our own, and in what way.
Taking "spare the rod, spoil the child" seriously, it seems that a good question to think about to begin with, is what do I gain from any particular form of discipline. Spare the rod is not directly about punishment, but about correction, ie. you'll do your kids a social/behavioural/moral disservice by not punishing wrongdoing. I think this is particularly poignant in these end times, because wrath will be dealt with on the last day, and has clearly been put in the hands of God, not me.
Another thing I want to think through is God's forgiveness. God is extremely long suffering, and forgiving. We like to say that God disciplines his children - where is that again? But then, how much? I sin pretty bad, every day, and how often do I get an Almighty smack? Rarely... Pretty much never. God is kind and merciful.
Well, I'll start the book tonight I hope. If my health holds up...
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We rarely smacked our kids. I think my wife was more comfortable with smacking than I was. The old adage "this will hurt me more than you" is true. I felt terrible whenever I did it, which was very rare. But we never took a conscious decision not to smack, but the need for it hardly ever arose.
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